Sunday, November 23, 2014

It's Sunday and I was going to go to church, but today I am mad at God and very upset at Him for not answering any of our prayers. God can perform miracles and I prayed for one everyday for the last couple of years and He didn't listen to me, and now Jimmy is gone......

Thursday, November 20, 2014

2008 Saturn Outlook SR

Today feels like Friday, but I understand that it's Thursday and that's good.  Means I haven't skipped or lost a day.  The days fly by so fast and it's not good to skip days when they already feel like they fly by much too fast anyway.

Part of the deal that Ray made for me with a used car dealer was that he put four new tires on my Saturn Outlook, so yesterday I spent several hours waiting at the tire shop for my new tires and a free alignment.  Oh yes, I'm now driving a new to me used car because my old Taurus just had too many problems, so Ray took it upon himself, without me asking, and went out in search of a good used car for me to drive and when he found it he did all the dickering over the price so that all I had to do was to show up and sign the papers.  The catch was that I had to give up my prized possession as part of the deal.....my 1991 Jeep Wrangler.  Everyone has wanted it and I get lots of offers asking me to sell it, but it was something that I never would part with, but it was time, so the dealer got my jeep and my car as part of the deal. 

The day before yesterday I saw my jeep go by my house and it was kind of sad seeing someone else driving it.  I had the jeep before I married Jimmy and never would part with it, but now that Jimmy is gone the jeep just some how doesn't seem so important anymore.

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Missing Jimmy

I thought that I would grow older with Jimmy, but here I am alone and without him by my side.  He loved life so much and found enjoyment in everyday and in everything that he did.  I have so many fond memories of him and we shared so much.  He was my best friend and a wonderful husband, father and grandfather.  He made no distinction and did not recognize the words, step or in-law.  If you were family, you were family.  That's just the way he was.  No wonder everyone loved him so much, and that's why I loved him so much.

I spend most of my alone time gazing at pictures of him and listening to the music that we listened to together.  Each picture of him has a story, a special memory attached to it that I hold near and dear to my heart.  Sometimes I switch the music over to our Christmas songs because he loved Christmas so much.  It wasn't just December 25th that he liked, but he loved all that led up to that special holiday, the baking and candy making.  I loved shopping for Christmas gifts for the grandchildren and would drag him along.  He preferred to give money and in the last couple of years or so we did just that.  

Jimmy's birthday is just a couple of days away on November 21st. and he would have been 78 years old.  I miss him so much and the holidays will never be the same without him.