Relationships between a man and a woman are sometimes difficult. I'm no expert on relationships, but I do have an opinion on how I think they should be handled.
In a relationship you need to be flexible and able to compromise, and meet each other half way. One person should not make every single decision for the other person. It's all well and good that some women want their partners to be the head of the house, but men please don't take this to mean that you make every single decision without first talking it over with your partner. Some women have no problem with doing everything their husbands want them to do and following their lead, but I do. I will not follow anyone's lead if I don't believe that it's in my best interest to follow like a hog being led to the slaughter. I don't have a ring in my nose, and I will not be led anywhere I don't want to go.
Some say that I'm stubborn and bull-headed, but if you want to be with me, I need to be myself and not just a mirror image of my partner. I'll do almost anything he wants me to do within reason, but in order for me to feel happy about pleasing him, he needs to do things that make me happy, and by including me in decisions and letting me be myself even tho he may sometimes not like what I have to say or the opinions that I have because they differ from his. This doesn't mean that he can't have his own opinions, which may differ from mine, of course he can! He also needs to be happy with who he is too, and changing him is not what I want to do. After all, if I changed him, he wouldn't be the person that I fell in love with, but I have to admit that he actually was a different person on his best behavior until he moved in with me....then he changed, but all I'm saying is that we need to accept each other for who we individually are and not get mad because we are not perfect and have our own opinions and faults. We also need to make decisions together as a team if we are to remain together.
Another problem that I have with my partner, which seems to happen in other relationships too, is that sometimes when someone outside the home makes them mad, they come home and treat their partners badly or as if their partners had done something wrong. Rick didn't speak to me for two days and then this afternoon I found out that on the day he came home mad, that he was actually mad at one of his co-workers who had called him and told him to meet him at a certain place and then the co-worker never showed up or even called to say that they couldn't make it. Rick waited for him for two and a half hours and I can understand why he was upset with him, but for the life of me I can't understand why people come home and then take it out on their partners who have done nothing at all to hurt them or to make them mad.
I try to be patient and wait it out, wait until he gets over his madness, but sometimes I'm pushed to the limit with unfounded accusations against me and then I lash out and let it all fly. I tell him to go home if he's not happy here (this is the short version). Of course, he never leaves anymore like he used to at first, but I know that one day he just might. Now I'm finding myself slowly pulling away from him so if that day ever comes I won't be too hurt. This is definitely not the way a good relationship should go, but I don't know what else or how else to handle things when one person refuses to compromise and make concessions. He walks with one foot in the relationship and the rest of his body out.
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